As much as we try to focus on the positive aspects of our children, there are times when we need to offer a critique. If you have an ADHD child, you likely also have a long “laundry list” of actions and behaviors that could be improved upon. Yet, pointing out only what they do wrong can be a huge mistake. Often, the child will shut down and tune out and none of your helpful hints will penetrate the wall they put up to avoid the sting from your criticism.
The Compliment Sandwich is an effective method of delivering critiques. The Compliment Sandwich is best used with the smaller, day to day issues.
Here are the basics of a Compliment Sandwich;
- Clearly identify the issue that needs improvement.
- Think of something they do very well related to the situation.
- Choose another positive point to remark on. This should be very loosely related to the above point.
- Deliver the first compliment.
- Clearly address the improvement you would like to see.
- Finish with the last compliment.
Criticism wrapped in compliments takes out the sting and opens the door for sincere communication.